Inconvenient
by bitterfloof
Summary: He wanted to sleep, but the pain made that impossible. He had to take medication, but for that, he had to eat and that was out of the question because the mere thought of food made him want to throw up. He couldn't do anything for himself and it made him feel so . . . Helpless.


Note: **ALTERNATIVE UNIVERSE. Crossposted on AO3**

* * *

It was meant to be a romantic getaway . . . well, as romantic as they could get. Akutagawa wasn't exactly the most romantic guy, but he was trying - honestly - because Atsushi was probably the best thing that had happened to him in a very long time. Which is why he was so determined to make their weekend away nice . . . that hadn't happened. Not in the slightest. One second they had been walking down the street, seeing sights and window shopping when the sudden pain in Akutagawa's skull decided to make itself very know - to the point that he physically cringed at how quick the pain had come on. Of course Atsushi, in all his perceptiveness, had noticed instantly.

"I'm fine, really," Akutagawa tried to argue, not wanting to cut their time out together short - he just wanted it to be a nice weekend damn it. "You don't need to do this."

"It's really not a problem," Atsushi replied reaching a hand out to stroke Akutagawa's hair, when the dark haired male snatched a hand around Atsushi's wrist, holding his hand in place awkwardly hovering in the negative space between them.

"Don't."

It came out way more aggressive that it was meant to, but that was a great reflection of how Akutagawa felt. He'd been whisked back to their hotel room and since then it had all gone downhill. The headache (no, migraine) was making his vision watery and the lights, even though they had been turned off, still burned through his skull. Atsushi had kindly even shut over the curtains but they didn't quite meet in the middle and left a small gap of very bright, very painful light.

So yeah, he didn't mean to snap at his boyfriend, but he also just felt like absolute shit. Which wasn't really a reason to be horrible, but Akutagawa wasn't in his right mind to consider it.

"Can you just bludgeon me with a brick," he mumbled into the pillow, honestly that would preferable to what he was dealing with - fucking migraines.

"I doubt that would make you feel any better," Atsushi replied smiling a little to himself, at least the migraine hadn't complete knocked out his boyfriend's dark sense of humour. "I'll go and get some painkillers for you, maybe you'll feel better afterwards."

"Kay," Akutagawa said, still muffled by the pillow. He felt the bed shift as Atsushi stood and only for a moment the room was bathed in light from the hallway and Akutagawa couldn't help but cringe. It wasn't very often he got migraines or headaches, but every time he did he forgot how . . . inconvenient they really were. He wanted to sleep, but the pain made that impossible. He had to take medication, but for that, he had to eat and that was out of the question because the mere thought of food made him want to throw up. He couldn't do anything for himself and it made him feel so . . .

Helpless.

And he hated that. Sure, he loved Atsushi dearly (not that he had an easy time saying or expressing it), and the weekend was meant to be a nice getaway but he never wanted his boyfriend taking care of him because of a stupid migraine. He wanted to be out on the town, exploring, taking stupid photos with Atsushi, maybe buying some silly tourist-y gift, go for a nice dinner . . . actually enjoy their time away. But nope, he was stuck lying in a dark room feeling like death warmed over with his ever loving boyfriend staying by his side - even though he totally didn't have to.

Akutagawa didn't know how long Atsushi had been away, lying with his face buried in a pillow in all attempts to block out the light really threw all senses out of whack. The one thing that Akutagawa did know was that he felt like the world was pulsing . . . which was a weird sensation. Weird, in that it made him feel incredibly nauseous. Even with his eyes shut tightly and the pillow pressed against his face, it felt as though his entire head was being pulled back and forth in two directions, pulled back and pushed forwards over and over incessantly and if it wasn't the worst feeling.

Curling up further into himself, hands gripping at the sheets, Akutagawa couldn't help but wish Atsushi was back already - there was something oddly calming about him that Akutagawa could do with in that moment. Atsushi's presence was soothing and in that moment, he could do with some soothing because, by god, did he feel like shit. The pulsing feeling wasn't getting any better, if anything it was getting worse . . . and worse . . . and . . . oh.

Oh shit.

"Ugh, no," Akutagawa moaned pitifully pushing himself up from the bed. He didn't want to open his eyes, lest the light make how shit was already feeling any worse. In hindsight, that was probably a bad idea, in a split second Akutagawa went from trying to find the end of the bed to falling onto the floor (just missing smacking his already tender head on the bedside table). The fall didn't make anything better - instead, Akutagawa lay in his misery for a moment silently thanking that there was nobody around to witness what a failure he was being.

However, lying on the floor wasn't making his predicament any better as bile began to surge up his throat, resulting Akutagawa choking and coughing bitterly, swallowing the vile substance (silently praying he never had to do that ever again) as he returned to his efforts to make it to the bathroom in an effort to protect whatever little dignity he had left - at least he hadn't thrown up on the floor, that was one small saving grace.

It also didn't really make him feel any better - but it was the best he was going to get.

Resigning his fate, Akutagawa opened his eyes and instantly regretted it. Even if the light in the room wasn't that intense, the pulsing in his head and the swaying of his vision intensified tenfold and Akutagawa all but crawled towards the bathroom, pushing the door open with a resonating clatter that made Akutagawa cringe. On top of that, the curtains in the bathroom were wide opening, allowing the sunlight to bounce off the white of the tiles around the room. The brightness seared Akutagawa's sensitive eyes, adding to his growing list of annoyances (irritants?) and it was all he could do was throw himself over the toilet and hope that the ground would just swallow him up.

"Fuck," Akutagawa moaned into the pristine whiteness of the toilet, he was nauseous as hell but the earlier pressing need to throw up had receded to a point that he was sure he would be okay (maybe). However, now that he was in the bathroom, he didn't really want to leave. That burst of adrenaline that had got him there, had all but left him weak and shaky and generally in pain. All Akutagawa wanted to do was sleep, but that was pretty impossible to do on the floor of a bathroom floor that was way too bright for its own good. "Guess I'm staying here," he thought to himself, curling up on the floor, covering his eyes with his arms (not that it did much but it was better than nothing).

* * *

It was an undetermined amount of time when Akutagawa felt a soft hand running through his hair, he groaned, shoving the hand away from him.

"No~ don't."

"Sorry."

Oh, it was just Atsushi. How long had he been away for? Akutagawa couldn't tell, peaking out from behind his arms, he cringed at the light before covering his eyes once more, rolling to try and bury his head into the floor. Atsushi knelt down next to Akutagawa, slowly rubbing circles into his back.

"Do you want to go back to bed?" Atsushi asked softly, his voice echoing around the bathroom. Akutagawa could only nod in response. "Okay."

It was a slow going process. The pain made Akutagawa pliable, but also complaintive and slow over all, he barely wanted to pick up his feet to make it from the bathroom to the bed. All he wanted to do was be done with the migraine, but that wasn't going to happen unless it just went away by some miraculous means - or by medicated intervention (and one was certainly way closer to happening than the other). But it still didn't make walking any easier and even if Atsushi was a touch taller than Akutagawa, it didn't make moving him any easier.

"I should just carry you," Atsushi mused quietly.

"No~ I'm fine," Akutagawa replied even though his screwed up eyes and stumbling steps did not in the slightest scream 'fine' to anybody. The very thought made Atsushi laugh a little - his boyfriend was so fiercely independent, hell could be dying or bleeding out and likely still claim that he was just fine.

Eventually, the couple made it back to the bed and Akutagawa flopped onto it gracelessly, instantly regretting that decision as his brain rattled about in his skull and he couldn't help but cringe as the pain he had been experiencing shot up a few notches. Why couldn't it just let up and leave him alone? What had he done to deserve such bullshit? Nothing! Fuck, he just wanted to spend some time with Atsushi and that had all just gone to shit. Yay, what a joy.

"Here, take this." Akutagawa opened his eyes slightly to see some small pots of yoghurt as well the medication and water Atsushi was holding out to him. "Eat this and then take these, you can go to sleep."

"It'll make me sick," Akutagawa forced out.

"Not if you eat something it won't."

Akutagawa felt five years old, being taken care off. Forced to eat and take medicine and being laid down to sleep. Except he was an adult in a proper relationship. With somebody who just had his best interests at heart - what had he done to deserve Atsushi; honestly, Akutagawa couldn't say but he was thankful he was there. Forcing down the yoghurt, he took the medication and lay down, nuzzling into the duvet with Atsushi rubbing circles into his back (he had apparently learned that his head was off limits when it came to comfort).

It was a particularly soothing gesture . . .

* * *

The next time Akutagawa they opened in a flash, a deep seated feeling of something being wrong . . .

"Ah shit." It came out as a stumbled moan and Akutagawa was sent stumbling back into the bathroom (at least his legs were back in working order, thank god for small mercies) as the yoghurt he had consumed earlier reappeared in a gross frothy mess into the bathroom sink. Smooth. He could hear Atsushi approaching behind him but he stuck out a hand, coming in contact with the front of Atsushi's shirt - he wildly underestimated how close he had got apparently. "Leave me alone."

"You sure?" Atsushi asked, worry clearly lacing his voice and it made Akutagawa's chest hurt to send him away, but he also didn't want anybody (even his own partner) to see him in such a state. If he was going to be sick, he wanted it to be in the comfort of his own presence. Sure, it was sweet that Atsushi would try and comfort him during a pretty gross time - but Akutagawa was not exactly one to appreciate it.

"Yes. Just . . . wait outside."

"Oh . . . okay."

He did feel bad sending Atsushi away, but he just needed time to collect himself away from the eyes of anybody that wasn't just himself. Running water into the sink draining away the filth, Akutagawa ran a hand under the cold water before swiping it over his face and the back of his neck, letting it run down in an attempt to cool himself down. He just wanted to feel better and whilst his migraine had pretty much receded into a small annoyance, the wobbly way his body felt had replaced it much to his chagrin.

Yeah, the weekend was gonna suck if he wasn't going to instantly get better . . . which didn't seem very likely. Eventually, he felt sure enough he wasn't going to throw up again and, after drying off his face with a towel, exited the bathroom to find Atsushi sitting on the bed - the most concerned looking expression written across his face. He looked up the moment Akutagawa entered the room, seemingly fighting the urge to stand up and ask a million questions.

"You feeling better?" Atsushi asked quietly as Akutagawa sat down on the bed next to him, resting his head on Atsushi's shoulder, he nodded against it.

"Sorry," Akutagawa said quietly.

"For what?" Atsushi asked, placing a gentle hand against the side of his boyfriend's face, stroking the long parts of his hair, carefully threading them through his fingers.

"Ruining the weekend."

Atsushi let out a half laugh. "There will be other weekends."

Akutagawa nodded, rolling the other way to flop onto the pillows, all strength leaving him. It didn't take long for him to fall asleep as Atsushi pulled the covers up around his shoulders, stepping back and smiling slightly to himself. Akutagawa was not the easiest person to get on with and he could be abrasive and maybe a little mean - but they had an understanding that, outwardly, might have been a little confusing; but Atsushi knew what they meant to each other.

And if that meant watching over his sick boyfriend, then so be it.

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 **Thank you for reading!  
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